Confusion is one of the fastest ways to lose yourself in a conversation

Confusion is one of the fastest ways to lose yourself in a conversation.
Whether it’s intentional or subconscious, confusion has a way of pulling you off center.
You try to clarify.
They misunderstand.
You explain again.
They become defensive.
You try to bring the conversation back to the original issue.
Now they’re talking about your tone or your frustration instead of the problem.
Some people blame.
Some flatter.
Some use false humility.
Some apologize without ever taking responsibility.
Some won’t clarify because they notice they have control when you become confused.
Whatever the strategy, the result is often the same.
You leave the conversation wondering what just happened.
Frustration begins to rise even more…not because you’re irrational, but because you’re trying to hold onto reality while someone else keeps moving it. 🤯
You think you are having one conversation and they are having another.
That’s why discernment matters.
The moment I recognize confusion entering a conversation, I become much more intentional.
I slow down.
I choose my words carefully. I stop chasing clarity from someone who may not be able…or willing…to provide it.
Sometimes I catch it early.
Sometimes I don’t.
Sometimes I still get emotionally reactive.
But I’ve noticed something.
Recovery is much quicker now because I no longer allow another person’s confusion to pull me off my emotionally healthy square.
I don’t need to win the conversation.
I don’t need them to agree.
I don’t need to explain myself ten different ways hoping they’ll finally understand.
I simply return to truth.
I’ve also learned something else.
Confused people often confuse people.
Not because they’re evil, but because you cannot give away what you don’t possess.
A person who lacks clarity often communicates confusion.
So I pay attention to what consistently creates fog instead of light.
Things like…
Flattery that disarms you.
False humility that hides self promotion.
Defensiveness instead of curiosity.
Blame instead of ownership.
Strategically changing the subject.
Making your reaction the problem instead of addressing the issue.
Conversations that leave you questioning your own reality.
Word salad that makes absolutely no sense leaving you wondering if you even know what the conversation was originally about.
God is not the author of confusion. People are.
And so are spirits but that’s a conversation for another day. 🫣
Healthy communication is clear. Takes accountability.
Is curious. Doesn’t attempt to manipulate outcomes.
Confusion.
And.
Chaos.
Those things can grab ahold of you and disorient you.
Pulling you away from your truth.
More importantly The Truth.
Don’t let the control drama of confusion derail your peace.
Clarity is a struggle for people that don’t even understand themselves.
Don’t follow them into the chaos. Stay grounded.
Ask for clarity.
End conversations that go in circles.
Restate the purpose of the conversation.
And reorient the focus back to where it needs to be.